One Night Page 8

  Back home my life was so regimented. My work schedule was planned out months in advance as we tackled each module in our application. My social life was no different and sitting all alone in a hotel in rural Iceland I realised that all spontaneity had been sucked out of my life. I was beholden to an electronic calendar with every day accounted for. Maybe this stifling conformity was what was making me want to pack it all in and live in such a remote place or maybe it is because of Jonas I thought and felt a tightness in my chest.

  I could also feel a dull ache in my joints and my body felt like it had been cast out of lead. Everything looked grey and washed out to me and I could feel dread nipping at my heals. I am a rational and logical person I told myself, don't panic until you know more. I did not want to waste mental cycles on an outcome I could not control I told myself as I tried to apply the cold logic of programming to my life. In the real world I knew the unexpected happened and unlike when programming, I couldn't go back and tinker with some lines of code to produce another outcome. Maybe thats why I loved to live in the structured world of tech so much, I couldn't handle the uncertainty of real life. I needed to change this I knew. I breathed in deeply a few times and readied myself to face the world and headed down stairs to the reception.

  As I walked down the corridor towards the elevator Jonas’s face flashed into my mind for the briefest of seconds. It was not the face of the caring handsome man that I had spent an amazing night with. What I imagined was the bloated and grey pallor of someone who had drowned at sea. My legs felt weak and a cold sweat drenched my body. I steadied myself against the wall and said out loud “Pull yourself together Sasha”.

  The nightmare image receded and I made my way slowly downstairs. The lady in reception wore a crisp blue suit and the colour made her pale Icelandic skin look all the more translucent. The longer I spent in this country the more I witnessed that it wasn't just the landscape that was stunning.

  “How are you this morning Ms. Lee?” she greeted me in her sing song english.

  “I could be better. Is there any news about the herring boat that went missing a few nights ago?” I asked. I noticed that her eyes looked tired and ringed in red and even the liberal amount of makeup she wore couldn't hide it. Before she spoke my stomach lurched and I knew bad news was coming.

  “Late last night they found most of the crew. The rescue helicopter was able to leave yesterday when the storm stopped. The ship had gone down close to shore and the crew swam to safety. The men made their way to an abandoned mountain hut near to where they landed and stayed put until they where rescued last night. Two of the crew are still missing,” she said.

  I dug my nails into my hands before speaking and I could already feel my body begin to shake. “Did Jonas Danielsson make it ashore” I said hearing the quiver in my voice.

  “I don't know that as they haven't released the names on the news yet. The crew is still in the hospital. They suffered some hypothermia and dehydration. The latest report this morning was that a full list of the men who were rescued will be released to the media at noon,” she said.

  I needed to get to the hospital as quickly as possible otherwise I would be consumed by this feeling of dread and I wouldn't be able to function. I just wanted to throw myself onto the floor and cry. Be strong I told myself this is all a test, a test of your strength. I thought of my grandmother and her wise words about trying times and I tried to do her proud by holding myself together. I was helping no one if I let the darkness seep in and allowed myself to become an emotional wreck.

  Chapter Nine

  A vacant cab was waiting outside the hotel and we headed to the hospital. The town was covered with a blanket of snow and coloured lights blinked from shop windows. Within five minutes we where outside the hospital, a large imposing grey building. It was so solidly and plainly built that it stood in stark contrast to the small colourful houses that crowded the town centre. The big blocky grey building looked more like a cement factory than a place of healing.

  I stood at the entrance breathing deeply and readied myself for the worst. The young receptionist didn't have the names of the rescued fishermen and directed me to the ward they where in.

  I followed the green line on the wall that lead to the fishermen's ward. I knew with each step along the corridor I was getting closer to a moment of change in my life. One path lead to a meadow of sunshine and chirping birds swooping through the air and the other path lead its way through a dark decaying forest. Time slowed as I moved down the corridor, each click of my heal on the floor caused me to ball my fists tighter and my nails dug crescent moons into my palms. At that moment I knew that he didn't make it, I could feel this knowledge pushing down on my skull. Crushing me with its weight and grinding all hope out of me. I had never felt more certain in my life about anything and all logic and rationality had left me far behind. I knew that Jonas was gone and as I got closer to the ward I could feel myself slowing down as this horrible idea gripped on to my imagination. Jonas was lost at sea that much I was certain of. I swallowed hard as I tried to hold back the tears.

  I turned the corner and Jonas was standing at the far end. I could feel tears stinging my eyes and I increased my pace. He was on the phone and he looked up. It really was Jonas and a smile engulfed his face when he seen me barreling towards him. My heart ached as we drew closer. Jonas opened his arms wide and he had tears in his eyes too. He wrapped his massive arms around me and pulled me close. I held him as tight as I could and sobbed into the warmth of his neck. “I never thought I’d see you again,” I said between sobs.

  “Me too” he said. My heart rose and soared above the clouds and colour returned to the world. Everything snapped back into place and I felt like I was home and safe while in his embrace.

  He ran his work hardened hand along my cheek and tilted my face towards him. Our lips touched and it was like an electric shock was sent through my body. I pulled him close and ran my fingers through his hair and kissed him deeply. I knew it right then standing in that antiseptic hospital corridor, I was falling in Love with Jonas and falling for him hard. The rational part of me knew it was all happening too fast, but the cold voice of reason was losing against the warm feeling inside me. As we kissed it was the intensity of my feelings that blotted out any rational voice in my head. I had lead my life in a sequence of measured risks, never taking too much of a chance. Now as we kissed and my heart swelled with happiness I knew that I had to change, I had to be more like my grandmother and follow my heart no matter what the consequences could be. No more second guessing myself I thought.

  The sound of clapping dragged me out of the blissful feeling as we kissed and when we separated we saw a small bunch of doctors and nurses standing around clapping and cheering. Jonas beamed and it was infectious. I let out an uncontrollable laugh as the last of the tension left my body.

  “Leave us alone you perverts,” Jonas said and everyone laughed.

  Jonas lead me to his room and we sat on the bed. He held my hands and looked down at his lap. I could see he was building up to telling me everything.

  “You don’t have to do this now,” I said and rubbed the stubble on his cheeks.

  He looked up at me and I knew he had to tell me. “It was horrible. We were all in our bunks when the boat drifted and hit some rocks. It all happened so fast. We were in the water and only some of us had managed to grab our survival suits. In those temperatures you could be dead within minutes when you hit the water. We were lucky the boat had crashed not too far from shore and eight of the crew of ten made it to the shore line. We never seen the other two. It was Rafn and a young guy who wasn't very experienced at sea, he was on his winter break from university and joined us for some extra cash. One of the other guys knew roughly where we had landed as he had hiked extensively around the area every year during the summer. He lead us to a mountain rescue hut a few kilometres away. By the time we got there most of us had no feelings in our feet or hands. We got a fire going and kept warm as be
st as we could. The next morning the helicopter found us.”

  He paused for a minute staring off into the distance. I knew if I looked him directly in the eye I would start crying again. He must be broken up inside about his friend. I had only seen him interact with Rafn for a few minutes and during that glimpse I had seen that they had the closeness of two brothers. I reached out and took his hand in mine.

  He continued “If any body can make it out there in that harsh weather its Rafn. Im not going to give up on that tough guy yet. He is a survivor and I have never seen anything beat him before. Remember I told you about the schoolhouse fire?” I nodded.

  “He was the one who saved me. If it wasn't for Rafn I wouldn't be here today,” Jonas said and clenched his jaw. “I managed to find the missing kid huddled behind a piano in the music room. I picked him up in my arms and made my way back towards the front door. By now the hair on my head was starting to singe and my lungs felt like they were going to burst into flames. I was only a few feet from the door when part of the roof collapsed pinning the kid and I underneath the heavy oak beams. I struggled to lift them but could get no leverage.”

  Jonas lifted my hand to his lips and kissed the back of it before continuing. “I faced down death and knew this was the end for me. My world was beginning to fade to black when through the billowing smoke came Rafn. He wedged himself under the burning beams and lifted them off of us and then dragged both of us coughing and spluttering into the light. Rafn collapsed beside us, his back was badly burned and he spent the next three weeks in the hospital getting treated. I was in for a week and luckily hadn't been as burnt as him. The kid thankfully was ok. I visited Rafn every day and helped him through the hard road to recovery. That man is like a brother to me and I owe him. Im getting a boat and I am going to go looking for him. I owe him my life and I know he would do the same for me.”

  I wanted to protest, I had just got Jonas back and now he was going to head out onto the sea again. I knew anything I would say would be futile so I just said “You are a good man Jonas” and I kissed him tenderly on the cheek.

  He held my face in his hands and looked down at me. “I am coming back don’t you worry about that. I don't think there is a force in this tiny arctic country that could keep me away from seeing you again.”

  “Promise,” I said fighting back tears.

  “I promise,” he said with a serious look on his face.

  We checked out of the hospital and were in a taxi once again as it made its way along the thin strip of blacktop that clung to the side of the fjord. The sea was calm with small white birds bobbing along in the currents. Chunks of ice of dazzling white moved slowly in the currents and in places a thin layer of ice that looked like it was made of frosted sugar bobbed up and down with the gentle roll of the waves.

  We pulled up to Jonas’s small wooden house and got out. Was it only a few days ago that I was first here I thought. With everything that had happened It felt like another lifetime ago. My rush of meetings at the universities and the pride I’d felt at closing the deals seemed so far away now. All thoughts of my business and team back in San Francisco had been forgotten about as soon as I had got the horrible news about Jonas. As I stood breathing in the crisp fresh air of the fjord it felt like this was the first time in days that I could breath without a tight band of tension compressing me. I never dreamed I would be back here so soon and my eyes soaked up every little detail of the place again.

  The taxi pulled away and Jonas lifted me into his arms. With his massive strength he held me aloft with ease. I nuzzled into the warmth of his neck. “I’m really glad you came back,” he whispered in to my ear.

  “I never thought I would see you again,” I replied.

  Once across the threshold I felt a rising warmth in my stomach and my cheeks briefly flushed. All the pain and anguish of the past hours slipped away and I wanted to be close to Jonas again.

  We didn't need to speak and he carried me into the bedroom and lowered me to the bed. He bent to kiss me and I greedily pulled him close to me. Our tongues danced across each others and my senses were filled with the taste of this viking man. Jonas trailed his kisses down my body, his warm lips and tongue leaving a sweet tickling sensation as they moved down my stomach.

  My clothes were no match for the viking and with a couple of swift moves he slipped my skirt and panties off. I threw my head back waiting for what was about to come. He opened my legs and ran kisses up my thighs and when he reached my silken folds he flicked his tongue across the surface. I let out a long appreciative moan. My toes curled at the sensation. When his tongue slid into me I bucked up off the bed and let out a long sigh. All the tension left my body as Jonas masterfully used his tongue and fingers on me. I could feel myself about to peak already as he worked his magic on me. I wanted him inside me when I reached my climax and I reached down and ran my fingers through his hair

  I pulled him towards me and we fumbled with his belt buckle and he roughly pulled off his trousers. Jonas rose up and we locked eyes. No words needed to be said. I could see he felt the same as me, this was more then just animal lust. This was a real moment of connection between us, all fears about it being nothing but a one night stand evaporated like steam.

  Jonas slid into me smoothly and we both moaned at the exquisite sensation. I could already feel my orgasm about to peak and my breath started to come in ragged bursts. Jonas speed up his thrusts. There would be time for long passionate love making sessions once we quenched our burning need for each other. Right now we both needed this and each other more than anything else in the world.

  Our eyes never left each other. My orgasm slammed into me and I let out a series of moaning gasps. Jonas’s eyes twinkled with a mischievous and satisfied glean. He had been holding on for this moment. His hip thrusts speed up and he came in me as my body was illuminated up by the radiance of my orgasm. My body hummed with the pleasure coursing through me.

  He slowed his pace as the peak of our combined pleasure began to ebb away. Jonas rolled over beside me and held me in his arms. I lay my head on his chest and listened to the steady beating of his heart.

  As the druggy relaxed post lovemaking euphoria set in Jonas said, “Sasha I’d love if you could stay in Isafjordur for some more time. I don’t want to scare you off with how sudden this all is, I’m falling in love with you.”

  His heartbeat speed up when he said those words. Mine was beating like a drum in my chest and a wave of happiness washed over me. How could this be happening to me so quickly? I was never this irrational back home. I had a life in San Francisco, a steady job, a small group of reliable friends and the next five years all mapped out before me, could I really give it all up I thought. Then I realised that I had only ever been living a half life back home, one filled with productive days and very little left in the margins. Maybe it was the part of me that enjoyed coding so much that had made me structure my daily routine like it was a problem that needed to be solved. Programming had thought me to be flexible when figuring out a unique solution to a problem but I had never done that in my own life. I had been living a safe and premeditated existence with coloured labels on a calendar dictating what I was going to do on any given day. The trip to Iceland was the first time uncertainty had been introduced into my life and the whole experience had been an awakening. Even at the times when I was the most distraught about Jonas I knew that this is what life is about, the highs and the lows. I had spent too much time back home tuning my life so that everything was a straight line with no deviation. I had been living a grey life filled with a stifling structure of my own construction. Iceland was the first time I got the chance to break free and see what a full life could be. I knew what I was gong to say and any concerns evaporated like snowflakes in the sea. “I love you too” I replied.

  We sat up in the bed and held each other for awhile without saying anything more. It felt right, this was where I should be. All practical concerns seemed meaningless. I wanted to spend my life with th
is viking man.

  We made love again and this time it was slow and passionate, the animal intensity of before tempered by my deep feeling for him. I loved Jonas and he loved me. The simplicity of the feelings brought a new depth to our love making.

  Later while Jonas was making us a strong cup of black coffee, my mind wandered. I thought about how different my life would be in this fjord compared to my hectic life in San Francisco. The rational side of my brain was already working out how I could run my team from this remote location and the emotional part was dreaming about the new full life I could lead with Jonas.

  We sat quietly drinking our coffee and I dreaded the moment that was coming, I knew what he was about to say even before he uttered the words. I knew the kind of man he was and I wouldn't have it any other way. Jonas stood up and said “I am going to the harbour now and I’m going to set sail and find Rafn. There is only a few hours of daylight left I will not be gone for long.”

  Arguing with him would of been pointless. Jonas was a brave and honourable man and leaving his friend stranded out in the wilds of the fjords was not an option for Jonas. A lesser man would of turned his back believing nothing could be changed. I could see Jonas was not ready to give up on his friend and he would not rest until he was safe on shore.

  We embraced tightly and Jonas said “I love you”. I don't think I could ever get bored of hearing those words from him and my skin prickled when he said them.

  “I love you too” I said and he left.

  This time I knew he would be back. I would not allow myself to think dark thoughts. Jonas was my brave viking hero and I was his African American queen. Nothing could keep us apart now, I could feel it in my heart every time I thought about him. I sat in the small kitchen drinking strong black coffee and I counted the minutes to his return and for the start of my new life in Iceland to begin.